This week has been emotionally draining and just all around terrible.
I was hit hard with the reality that I'm no longer a kid. My parents can no longer protect me...just continue to guide me.
My boyfriend, who is the most wonderful man in the world to me, is no longer anywhere near me.
I'm alone in a new place...and it sucks.
Tuesday I went to USF to say goodbye to my Air Force peeps...did some errands...said farewell to my coworkers...ate lunch with my parents and finally headed out north to spend til this morning with my boyfriend. Saying goodbye to my parents was heartbreaking without having to throw on having to say farewell to my boyfriend. It doesn't help that I'm emotional. I stress out easily and freak out even more so.
It took my 6.5 hours (thanks to pit stops) to get to my final destination in Alabama. Went straight from checking in to my room, to having a mental breakdown and calling my boyfriend, to realizing that the temperatures are freezing and I have only a skirt for my uniform on Monday.
Needless to say I rushed around til about 5:30pm when I met up with some friends who commissioned with me back in December. I'm going to be a terrible Officer...I don't know why people keep telling me otherwise. I freak/stress out easily and, in my career field, that's no good. I need to find a way to find my calm when shit hits the fan...because shit hit the fan this evening and it could have been bad.
Anyway, despite the fact that I literally know NOTHING about the military...I'm hoping for better days, and hopefully a wealth of knowledge for the next 6.5 weeks.
By the way, my fat ass needs to go to the gym. I WILL NOT fall prey to cold weather excuses! Tomorrow I shall begin again. I hope.
ok first of all - fat ass NOT
ReplyDeletesecond of all - you can do this. dont let your downfall be your confidence. you have been educated and trained for this and you are amazing.
we all miss you but we will all be here when youre done traveling the world. :P just stay safe. and ill pray for ya bud. :P
You called it!! I lack confidence and I always care what other people think.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying to work on it, but I don't think they give a class for that lol